Okay, so this week we seem to have regressed - I somehow look less pregnant than I did last week! It is still amazing to me - I feel like the skinniest 19-weeks (near five-months!) pregnant person ever - yet I feel chubby and stout nonetheless. My measurements continue to hover around the same numbers - my waist is now at 31.5 inches and the 'largest' part of my belly tops out at a whopping 33 inches. Mind you, I'm not complaining, as I have always feared that I'd blow up like a balloon during pregnancy, but it would be nice to look pregnant instead of just...thick. Otherwise, all is well, and I feel great. And I also feel the baby - with my hand! It came as a surprise to me when it first happened, but I definitely felt it, although it does not always coincide with the jabs I am feeling from the inside. The wonderful thing is that Ez was, after a few 35-second bouts of petulant frustration, able to feel it too, a good one at that. You could hardly wipe the smile off of his face.
As for me, I have been exercising quite diligently (5x this week!) but nothing strenuous, really. Yoga, lots of walking and some urban hiking. I'm still doing my squats and my kegels and just generally readying myself. I was thinking about many things yesterday on my hike through the forest - I've been hiking despite Vancouver's abysmal weather of late. A beautiful, dry fall, with the most gorgeous palette of ochre and umber against the evergreen backdrop of the North Shore mountains has turned to a dismal, grey deluge for November with record rains. It would be so easy to stay inside and indulge my only real craving: potato chips. But, fear not! I am a hardy outdoor girl and each day I suit up in my waterproof pants and jacket and I hike wherever I can, enjoying the quiet peace of the beautiful forest in which I live, enjoying the freedom of these last few months, breathing in the crisp, bright air. So, as I said, I got to thinking - one would train for any event of the physical - for sports, for running races, for kayaking - but so few people think of training for the ordeal of birth. So that is what I am doing. As Ez has said, it will be an endurance event, so I am working on walking for 1 hour at a time, moving up (I hope) towards a 2-hour weekly walk in the last trimester. I am training my body, my muscles and my mind for an arduous physical task - and I feel like it is the only thing that I can really do to prepare for such a dynamic and unpredictable experience. I will prepare myself as I would for any other physical task I take on - a new river run, a new mountain hike, a race (yeah, like I do those anymore!) - and then I'll see what happens on the day, just like I would then. I feel confident and strong about my abilities to give birth. I believe strongly in the capacity of both my body and my mind to rise to the occasion and I feel like I don't have to be filled with fear and apprehension, despite my desire to have a natural, intervention free birth. I am strong! I am woman! I am somewhat invincible!
At least that's my story so far.
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